Inside My Morning Quiet Time

Sometimes I just have to laugh at myself and my ability to completely lose my sanity. I was reading my Becoming a Vessel God Can Use book this morning and the author, Donna Partow, had some questions to ask. Now these are very important questions, but I was really struggling with my answers. Here's how it looked.

Donna's question: If you were to die tomorrow, what do you want people to remember? Write whatever comes to mind.

Ari's response: I don't really want to die tomorrow, but I want to be remembered as someone who loved the Lord...I hope these questions get a little more specific because this isn't really helping.

Donna's next question: What do you feel passionately about? If the subject comes up you perk up and can't stop talking?

Ari's response: Um, what don't I feel passionately about? And when has anyone ever gotten me to shut up. More importantly, what if I feel passionate about something, but say, have no motivation to do anything about it. Then I've got bigger problems than expected.

Donna's third question: When you go to a bookstore or library, what section do you drift toward?

Ari's response: Well let me see, in the last six months I have read Max Lucado, Rick Warren, a book about a woman who murdered her kids, a romance novel about a woman having an affair with Che Guverra, an allegory about the holocaust told in the form of the Fairy Tale, Sleeping Beauty, and I'm currently reading a business book called Built to Last. Oh, and my sister got me addicted to this literature rich, science fiction series about a Detective who can jump into classic novels to solve mysteries. Um...that narrows it down.

Donna's question: What do people compliment you about? What activities do you excel in?

Ari's response: I've been told I'll make a good wife and mother someday (nothing on the horizon). I used to be able to play basketball with some kind of skill, but I don't know that I could anymore. I can't remember a whole lot of compliments lately, except for the ususal you have nice hair or a nice outfit...oh and I'm a fast typer.

Donna's question: What did you dream of doing when you were ten years old? Think back. You may just discover that that little girl knew a lot more about who God created you to be than you realize.

Ari's response: I can barely remember ten - there have been so many things I've wanted to do all my life, but I'm pretty sure I wanted my own TV show. Yet, I'm not sure how that translates into ministry.

Donna's sixth question: If you could do one activity, all day, every day, for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Ari's response: If I had to do one thing every day, all day for the rest of my life, I'm pretty sure I would want to kill myself. How boring. How mundane. Sorry Donna - I'm afraid I'm somewhat of a disappointment in this little quiz.

Donna's final question: Has God laid a special burden on your heart - for a group of people, a country, a ministry? Maybe you made a special vow to him at a youth camp long ago. It's likely that God has tried, many times in many ways, to communicate your life mission. Reflect.

Ari's response: Okay, now we're to the heart of the matter. I do believe that God has tried many, many, many times in many, many, many ways to communicate my life mission to me, but what if I'm scared of the response? What if God really does just want me to do one thing, all day, every day of my life. That's scary. Or what if the task is less than meaningful to me? It's not unheard of in the Christian faith. I guess the truth is, I'm not ready for the truth. So it's back to my knees.